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today is jessica and my fourth wedding anniversary…

By October 23, 2008Blog


In celebration of our relationship, I thought I’d list out some of the reasons why I love my wife. (No particular order)

-When Jessica Nicole Turner wakes up in the morning, she does it with passion, like a lightening bolt with a to-do list. She’s on a mission, and while it sometimes annoys the hell out of me (and she knows this), more often that not I believe it’s one of her sexiest qualities.

-Jessica still writes letters. As in, with an ink pen. The real kind that get delivered to people by people (and not DSL). Seriously, who does that anymore? My wife does. And I love her for that.

-Jessica adores our son Elias. I see it in her eyes as she’s holding him just after he’s finished one of his lengthy breast-feeding sessions. He clings to her and I swear she’s clinging to him too. Passionately. Like she could live in that moment for forever. So amazing. Three months ago I watched my wife turn into a mother, and that was one of the most beautiful transformations I have ever witnessed.

-Jessica forgives me when I f**k up. So true. She has shown me a type of grace and forgiveness I’m not sure I ever encountered in my life prior to knowing her.

-When Jessica gets excited she does this cute little jump-in-place thingy that I think is adorable. It’s sort of like skipping in place if you only skipped once and you did it straight up and down. Not sure if that makes sense.

-Jessica loves me despite the fact that my job sometimes makes paying our bills difficult. Never once has she questioned my calling.

-Jessica says the words, “I love you, Matthew” at least five times a day.

-Even though I’m a skinny bald guy, she makes me feel like the sexiest man alive.

-Jessica enjoys trying new recipes.

-Jessica is comfortable in her own skin.

-When Jessica worships God through music, she raises her hands with freedom and abandon and somehow I find myself worshiping God too just by watching her.

-Jessica prays for me. She likes to dance in our living room. She volunteers. Sometimes she’s stubborn as an entire herd of mules. (Do mules come in herds? Not sure.) She’s unafraid to say exactly what’s on her mind at any given moment. She’s full of life. She’s my biggest fan.

I don’t deserve Jessica, I know that. She’s not perfect, but damn, sometimes I’m so smitten by her that I think she is. This last year has been the most difficult of our marriage. But with the arrival of our little bundle of love Elias, it’s also been the most joyous year of our marriage.

So, since it’s Jessica and my anniversary, let’s forget about Churched for a day… and instead, answer this question. Come on, do it.

What are some of the reasons why you love the special person–spouse, boy/girlfriend, parent, mentor, etc–in your life?

(But after you write your “whys” down, make sure you tell that person why you love them. Because even though it’s nice to hear the words “I love you,” sometimes it really helps to also hear why.

PS: Happy Anniversary, Jessica. I love you more than the sun, baby. More than the sun.

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Matthew Paul Turner

Author Matthew Paul Turner

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Join the discussion 40 Comments

  • That’s too sweet of you to post those reasons! I have also been married almost 4 years and find new reasons almost everyday why I am sooo thankful and in love with my hubbie!
    The things that annoy me, I miss when he is out of town.
    The way I eat my own words when I am certain I will not want certain things then I turn around and do, he is so cute about teasing me.
    Most importantly, we encourage each other to seek God first and then each other.

  • Southern Gal says:

    So Sweet.

    There are lots of reasons I love my husband, but I won’t go into all of them here. Twenty-eight years (on the 18th of this month) worth of love is a lot to cover. So I’ll just list the one that’s so important to me as a woman. (It’s the security thing.)

    My husband works shift work at a job he doesn’t love. He’s worked this job for 24 years in order to provide for his wife and children.
    I have been able to stay home with our three and home school them without having to worry about finances (much). He makes this sacrifice because he LOVES US.

    Also, he loves me and lets me know it all the time.

    OK that’s two. I couldn’t leave out the last one!
    Renee

  • Wow, 4 yrs! Congratulations…it only gets better from here, of course, sometimes it gets harder, but it always gets BETTER!

    Let’s see, after being in love with my man for 22 yrs and married to him for almost 20…
    I enjoy watching him work…he is a computer technician, self employed!
    He gets so involved in the process of ‘fixing’ a machine..I go through phases where I love it or it makes me jealous!!!

    I love watching him sleep…he is still and peaceful – and those two together don’t happen very often!

    I love watching him interact with our girls, when he is really listening to their stories that, like their Momma’s, can drag by! I love watching him and the girls at places like Main Event, when he truly becomes a kid again….really close to the 17 yr old guy I first fell in love with!

    I love that he is truly learning to love God! He is learning to trust our creator….our giver of life.

    I love watching God grow his self-confidence through his business….we know the biz belongs to God, without Him, we are nothing!

    I love touching him while he is stretching, probably the only time he becomes vulnerable…and it just looks so sexy!

    Okay, I think I’m done now! Thanks, Matthew for the opportunity to share my precious hubs! I will be e-mailing this to him.

    Pamela in TX

  • Sal says:

    Congrats! My wife, also named Jessica, and I are coming up on 3 years this December. We have 2 kids and it is amazing how fast time flies.

    Many of the reasons I love my wife are the same ones you have listed. For instance, she will say things and I will almost cringe because I could never say that in public, there is a never ending honey-do list that keeps me busy and on my toes.

    Sounds to me like you have a wonderful wife, so go spend some time with her and enjoy your anniversary.

  • HW says:

    I love my husband of 21 years because when he was in a meeting at corporate headquarters in London, my son called him to tell him how the Cubs did. He stepped out of that meeting and talked baseball with his boy. I love him because every night through the summer he sits on a bucket in our backyard and catches the softballs our daughter pitches to him; and if he wasn’t catching, he was helping to coach her team. I love him because, make no mistake, our two teenagers absolutely adore their father. I believe it is because of him and the way he treats me that our two teenagers treat me with respect and kindness.
    I love him because he is a good man. Plain and simple. Whatever you you think “good” is – that’s him. And he makes me strive to be a good woman. Plain and simple.

    Oh, and I love him because we laugh together – A LOT. After all these years, there’s still magic in his laughter.

  • My husband and I have been married 27 years. I love him because:

    He is not a complainer and I soemtimes, ok, even more than sometimes, I am and he never makes me feel badly about that.

    He is a committed physician who cares for his patients and delivers excellent, compassionate care.

    He keeps his word.

    He doens’t welch on commitments. if he says he will do something, he will do it (except pick up his clothes off the floor or windowseat).

    He actually suggested I get flannel PJ’s from LL Bean the other day because I am always cold.

    He loves our children.

    He serves many kids each summer at a camp for kids with skin disorders.

    He is humble.

    He comes to church with me.

    He doesn’t mind when I don’t cook dinner.

    And so many other reasons…

  • Anonymous says:

    tae…that was so sweet what you wrote about my sissy…i’m so happy that she has someone to love her the way you do. I love you guys…happy anniversary…i can’t believe it’s been four years already!

  • Elizabeth says:

    I read your blog regularly, but don’t comment. Today seemed like a good reason.

    I love my boyfriend of two years dearly, for many reasons. Here are just a few:

    He is a professional cyclist and, though he is incredibly talented and could be arrogant, he is the first to help anyone with cycling, regardless of their skill level.

    He has an impish grin that he flashes when doing something that drives me crazy.

    He is a far better cook than I am, and does it frequently.

    He loves to go on bike rides with me, and always puts a firm hand on my back and gives me encouraging words when riding up big hills.

    His response to why he can’t sing well (but does it often): “First of all, I don’t always know the words.”
    “Well, what’s the other reason?”
    (completely serious) “I’m tone deaf.”

    He says what me means and means what he says. He is committed to whatever he does.

    Happy Anniversary to the two of you! It’s encouraging to see couples who love each other so much.

  • Diane says:

    That was extremely sweet, Matthew. 🙂

    I have been married almost a year and a half. We have a beautiful 15 month old son. (Yes, we got pregnant before we got married.)

    But, here are some of the reasons why I love my man…
    ~He kisses me every morning when he wakes up, even though he is normally the first one to get up.
    ~He told me to marry him. Well, he did ask and propose and whatever, but when circumstances looked extremely grim, he looked at me and said, “We can do this. Marry me.”
    ~He loves our son with all his might. It’s amazing.
    ~He makes me feel beautiful and sexy even when it’s first thing in the morning.
    ~He makes me feel number one in his life.
    ~He laughs with me, cries with me, and allows me to be my complete emotional self. 🙂

    I’m sure there are more… but that’s all for now. Happy Anniversary, Matthew!

  • Michele says:

    Happy Anniversary Jessica and Matthew.
    My husband and I are celebrating our 20 year Anniversary on October 30, 2008.
    His name is Andy Stewart and these are the reasons why I love him so!

    Andy I love you becuase you are my best friend in the whole world. You were my first friend who ever told me about Jesus Christ and how much He loves me!

    Andy I love you becuase you are the LOVE OF MY LIFE! You are the other 1/2 of myself. I have known you for more than 1/2 my life. No one has ever touched me as gentle as you do. Even though you are 6’5 and I am 5’1 you are never a giant over me.

    Andy I love you because you gave me 4 beautiful children. I love how you held each and everyone right after they were born. Like a football. This tiny baby in these huge hands but yet showing a heart as tender as a lamb. I will never forget the day our daughter was born- You said “We got Hannah”!

    Andy I love the way you love life. I love that you love everything and hate nothing. I wish I had theat quality. I love how you will try anything new.

    Andy I love being Mrs. Andy Stewart. I love how your big hand wraps itself around my hand. I love how when you hug me your arms just take me in. I always feel so safe with you.

    Andy I love how you look at me. I love how you talk about me to others and I find out about it later. You are so kind and gentle.

    Andy most of all I am glad that you asked me to marry you 20 years ago and I said yes.
    Thank you for 20 long and sometimes hard years together but I would not ever change a thing.
    I love you sweety.
    Your now and forever,
    Michele

  • christi28 says:

    happy anniversary!

    what a sweet post matthew!

    blessings to you both on many many wonderful years!

  • Sara says:

    Happy Anniversary, Matthew!!!!!

    I have no spouse in my house, but I have friends who are faith-filled, kind, funny, gracious, generous, loving and caring. And the best part is they treat me exactly the same now that my life has changed as they did before when I was healthy and able. I’m so blessed and I tell them pretty much every time I see them that they’re cool.

    And Jessica’s hop thing? My friend Susie does that and we call it her Happy Dance. 🙂

  • pwm says:

    Happy Anniversary!! You are doing one of the best things now that you can do for your wife – telling other people how great she is. My husband and I have been married for 16 years. He is also great aboug lifting me up in public. Keep loving each other, loving your son (and others who come along) and loving Jesus.

    Catherine

  • Anonymous says:

    Masked profanity ruins your Christian witness. Just so you know.

  • You said absolutely beautiful reasons there for Jessica. Your both a lovely couple…Congratulations on your anniversary! =]

    I love my boyfriend because I could sit here for days and tell him about how good he smells, even when he’s not wearing any deoderant. How he just light up my face when I know he is coming over, or see that he is calling me or the best yet when he smiles. I love it how he still get shy about things even though he knows I love him. And most of all I love it when he is watching me and I can see him in the corner of eye. It makes me feel so important, loved and wanted. I love it when we snuggle under the duvet and giggle at the most silly things. I love waking up with him in the morning and asking how sweet my dreams were. I love how I miss him so much when he is gone I will sometimes count down to when I will see him again. I love the fact that he talks to my face and not my chest and I absolutely love that he calls me his baby and it shows up on his mobile screen when I call or text him. I love him because he is the one constant love that I don’t have to ask for because I know it is there to cherish. I love him.

    Sorry to be gushy! X.

  • Terri says:

    Happy Anniversary Matthew and Jessica! I work at WaterBrook Multnomah, so I read both of your blogs frequently and just get a kick out of you both. I think it’s just precious that you shared some reasons why you love your wife with the WHOLE WORLD! So I will join in and then share these things with my husband of 4 months. Yep, we’ve been together a total of 10 months and even though it’s been so fast I literally can’t imagine it any other way. I love him because it’s just natural. Like I have no choice. and I love him because he gives me kisses in the morning, even though he HATES the morning. I love him because he isn’t afraid of not conforming to society. I love him because he encourages me when I hesitate or wonder about things. I love him because he praises my cooking even though I CAN’T COOK! I love him because he is such a wonderful dad. I love him because he knows how to live stress-free (most of the time!) I him because he wants me to sit in the spare room and read while he plays video games. I love him for the way he can just sit still and be when I feel like a crazy person always trying to check things off the list. I love him because when I tell him I need or want something he absolutely doesn’t hesitate to give it or do it. I love him because this has been an emotional rollercoaster of a ride for me, but he just comforts me, holds me and lets me be me. I love him because he loves my parents. I love him because he is a teacher, not just to teach, but to be a friend to his students. I love him because he tolerates my OCD when it comes to cleaning and organizing. I love him because he grounds me. I love him because he takes care of me. I love him in jeans. I love him I love him I love him!

  • Jill says:

    Happy Anniversary.

    I don’t mean to put a damper on these wonderful posts, but I wept as I read your post and the comments.

    My husband of nine years was killed in a motorcylce accident on August 16th. As I have been accepting my new reality, I have been looking back on our relationship. I treasure the family moments that we shared and I appreciate all that he did for me and our boys.
    But I also look back and see all of the time I wasted arguing, being sarcastic, nagging, etc. I have learned so much about myself, and God, through this process of grieving.
    I urge all of you to FULLY love your spouses and remember that things can change in a heartbeat.

    Funny enough, the things I miss the most are all of the really annoying or quirky things that he did.
    What I wouldn’t give to have him snoring beside me again…

  • Pete Wilson says:

    Happy Anniversary. Love you guys!

  • Anonymous says:

    Congrads to you and Jessica! I enjoyed reading what you love about your wife – God bless you and keep you –

    My wife has seperated from me – she left 10 months ago – and yet I still love her very much – she has walked away from the LORD and this caused the major problems – please pray for us! God Bless.
    Daniel

  • Terroni says:

    Matthew, congratulations!
    Do you know The Luckiest by Ben Folds? This post sort of reminds me of that song…

    http://www.last.fm/music/Ben+Folds/_/The+Luckiest

  • Terroni says:

    Oh, and I have to agree with anonymous about the masked profanity. If you don’t spell the words out completely, your witness is toast. Just so you know.

  • Your Editor says:

    Okay. I’m caving because I love this post so much…

    Happy Anniversary, Matthew and Jessica!

    I love my husband of five months because he was completely unexpected, derailed my life, and is a tangible example of God’s grace. I love him because he rambles when he blesses our meal, talking to God about his day. I love him because he has become as addicted as I am to NPR podcasts. I love him because we read at night before we sleep, just like the Bradys. I love him because he is a good cook and he doesn’t even use recipes-something I wouldn’t risk. I love him because he tells me (and others) that my cooking is terrible, even though it’s not, because he knows that compliments make me twitchy. I love him because he’s so “parental” with our dog and cat. I love him because he has a tongue stud that is the complete antithesis of his personality. I love him because he loves our church community, because he doesn’t self-sensor, and because he cracks me up. I’m blessed because he doesn’t stopping thinking I’m remarkable even when I’m a pain in the ass. And I love him because he is braver, stronger, sexier, and smarter than he’ll ever know.

  • Terri says:

    Yeah. Spelling is really important when witnessing. Spell all 4 letter words out if you want to lead people to Jesus. 😉

  • Anonymous says:

    HaPpY aNnVeRsArY to the BOTH of you!!! Congratulations on this milestone along with the addition of your sweet boy!!

    My DH and I have been married 43 years and it feels “almost” like yesterday! 🙂 It hasn’t always been easy (we nearly divorced at about year #5 with 2 small babies. In retrospect that would have been ONE HUGE mistake! It would have changed the course of history (ours)…and our children’s. We haven’t always walked with the Lord neither and that too has shaped us. Now we have a heart for couples like yourselves and I would say ALL of the “stuff” we’ve gone through was worth it. I would say our relationship now is very comfortable and snuggly, like a well-worn comforter or sweater. I look at my husband and really hope the Lord gives us maybe another 25 years together! We’ll be not quite into our 90’s if so!

    If asked for advice…I would say stick with each other NO matter what. Continue to date and say I love you those 5X each day…and forgive one another!!!
    Blessings to all of you!!!!

  • Sara says:

    While I don’t typically comment on posts, I do often read comments. I am deeply grieved that someone would harp on Matthew for implying a curse word. You, Anonymous, are ruining Christian Witnessing. Jesus dined with prostitutes and lepers… do you really think that he’s shaking his head in Heaven over Matthew implying something? Furthermore, what happened to being an accepting christian? I have a hard time with my faith because of people like you. I hate hate hate watching Christians stand by, high and mighty, judging others. Go ahead and throw rocks – just be certain your house isn’t made of glass.

    Congratulations Matthew and Jessica. I think that this post was beautiful – implied profanity or not. You are a great witness and, while I know that you don’t need ME telling you that, I do want you to know that there are people who believe it.

  • Anonymous says:

    This is the first comment I’ve EVER left on blog…

    I was saddened to read the profanity in the midst of your sweet words for your wife. Still trying to figure out why you seem to be a “Christian” but use profanity on your blog? Is this acceptable now? Is this the “norm” for a Christian? I’m just confused.

  • Anonymous says:

    I agree about the profanity. Clean it up you are a Dad and that is not setting a good example. More than that, I am sad for your wife that she thinks that was a sweet post.

  • vaneblu says:

    last year I wrote my Husband 101 reasons why I love you, I am not going to post them all of course, when I decided to write them I realized that I had more than 101… he is an amazing men and truly completes me!!
    about all the anonymous comments about profanity, I am sure God is more hurt about you going anonymous than Mathew’s beautiful post about how much he loves Jessica… cowards!!

  • Karla says:

    I have been reading your blog and your wife’s for a few months now, and this is the first time I have commented, too.

    I have to say that I felt sad after I read this the other day. Such sweet words marred by words that did not need to be included. There is a difference between judging something and being saddened by it.

    The way I look at it is…we as Christians are to be a light in the world. We are to be different. This post could have come from anyone’s blog.

    I am not afraid to leave my name, nor to share these comments that truly come from my heart.

  • Don’t be sad for me. We are perfect for each other – asterisks and all.

  • Anonymous says:

    May the Words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight oh God my
    Rock and my Redeemer. Many Christians believe we need to be “tolerant” to things of this world, but the Bible tells us not to be of this world. The things you wrote were sweet to your wife, but I am puzzled why Christians believe this use of words is pleasing to God. Would you really say that to God? Would you want your child to repeat them. Yes, Christ did stand with the prostitute and others who needed Him and yes we are to share Christ with them. That has nothing to do with this. We as Christians are to encourage others to live more for God and thankfully we have the Bible to guide us in that.
    I do hope you have many more years of growing in your love with one another and with God.

  • Anonymous:

    OK, enough is enough. I hate to disappoint you, Anonymous, but you can ask my friends if you want to, because the truth is I would indeed read this exact post to God. Minus the asterisks of course. Because I believe God is not one to deny me the use of words, even when some in this close-minded dogmatic Pharisee-ridden culture I live in deem them ugly or inappropriate. So please, with all due respect, if you don’t like the words I use, then don’t read my blog. Because I don’t plan on changing how I communicate on your account.

  • Anonymous says:

    Matthew,
    I just wanted to reply to your last post as I was the anonymous person. My heart intent was not to bash you. With all sincerity, I really wondered those questions as we as Christians have different views on how we are to live before God and I was totally curious. I read Jessica’s post that I found thru another post as I love to read about people and that is how I went to your blog. I do not believe that I am any more special to God than you are just because we choose to use different words. That is not God’s character. I am sorry that I offended you with the way in which I communicated. It was not my intention.

  • No offense really. If I’d been offended I wouldn’t have approved the comment. I welcome debate in normal situations. But this post is supposed to be a celebration of my wife. Forgive my brash response. I certainly respect your point of view, I just don’t feel like debating it on this particular post. My response to you was more of a collective frustration from all of the “anonymous” comments, not just yours.

    Thank you for your kind reply. Peace.

  • Sometimes we need asterisks to get our point across. I guarantee, God would approve, in a case such as this 🙂

  • carter says:

    What the f**k! Thats a sweat and amazing list! I’ll write one for my GF today as well.. Thanks!

  • Joel Spencer says:

    I have no idea who you are, but happy anniversary! I must admit that you book title/cover are intriguing. I plan to return.

  • the girl at red robin says:

    happy belated ****ing anniversary! 🙂

  • Mandy says:

    Congratulations to you both on your anniversary! My husband, Matt, just returned home from your mutual friend’s wedding in IN, and was thrilled to have made a new friend. While he was at EDV’s wedding, I was marrying a couple in Atlanta’s Piedmont Park (I’m a minister, just to clarify. This was very confusing terminology for my four year old son who countered with: “But Mommy, didn’t you already marry Daddy?”), so we’ve been thinking a lot about weddings and marriage these past few days. Matt and I just celebrated our sixth anniversary in September (commentary available here: http://revmamaflemming.blogspot.com/2008/09/six-years-ago.html), and I am thankful every day to have the perfect partner in life, comforter in distress, support in trial, and one who loves me in all ways. Blessings to you and your family. I’m eager to start reading your book!

  • Anonymous says:

    Matthew,

    Perfect response to Anonymous, not that you needed my approval! Your words to Jessica were beautiful and I think any woman would be blessed to have someone love her more than the sun! I know I do!! Congrats (a few days late) and I wish you many more!

    P.S. Thanks for the bookmarks. I’ve been passing them out everywhere!! Even dropped a few in Halloween buckets! 😉

    -Sara, in MD.