holy feline

Special thanks to Stephanie for this story!

As soon as I watched this video, I got up off the couch and ran outside to see if I could find the furry stray cat that my neighbor feeds. It took me awhile, but when I finally found the little fellow, I was disappointed that my local cat didn’t have any Messianic markings on his fur. Which I figured could mean that he was Satan’s cat!

Then one of my neighbors came out and asked me what I was doing.

“I’m looking for Jesus,” I told her.

“On that ole cat?” she asked.

I nodded.

“There’s no way that cat is from Jesus,” she snarled. “That little thing is a b*tch!”

“What?” I said, “That’s a dog?”

“No, it’s mean!”

“Oh.”

So, with that said, please, if you see a black-and-white feline on the west side of Nashville, please beware! It’s a Devil cat, and while I couldn’t find Jesus’s face in its fur, between you and me, I do think I saw Chris Tomlin’s.

Scary stuff.

(And for the record, the face on that cat might also be Jerry Garcia. Which might mean a sign that those people in Indiana should start wearing tye died. I don’t know. Maybe.)

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