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DATING ADVICE FROM ‘HOW TO RUIN YOUR DATING LIFE’

By September 15, 2007Blog


My book How To Ruin Your Dating Life (that’s the Amazon.com link) hits bookstores this week. Yes, the cover is a little girly (and between you and me, kind of ugly), but I’m pretty sure the book has some “dating” advice you won’t read in any other dating book for Christians. I co-wrote the book with Kerri Pomarolli, a comedy writer from California. She and I have a little different take on being Christian and dating, so it’s a good mix I think of “he-said/she-said” commentary and advice on dating other Christians. I also think it’s a pretty good book for groups of people to read and discuss. If you’re interested in buying a large quantity, email me and I’ll hook you up with some kind of discount. For those of you who asked for a free copy to blog about, your books should be in the mail!

Here’s a sample from a sidebar that I wrote for the book:

Miracles Do Happen, but All of us Need A Little Sting Reality
[a few reality checks for Christian dating]

I admit; this sidebar is rather blunt. But all of us need a little tough love once in a while, right? Hey, I think it was Dr. James Dobson who said those words; it wasn’t me. So please take your issue up with him. But while you’re thinking about the best way to speak your mind to the Family guy, why not first come face-to-face with some reality? Oh, and one more thing: Most of these reality checks are meant for men and women, regardless of my pronoun usage [yet some are gender specific; I think you’ll be able to tell the difference].

• Just because both of you love Jesus doesn’t mean you’ll fit together like two puzzle pieces.
• Just because he loves Jesus doesn’t mean he won’t try to sleep with you [his moves will just be slower and guilt inducing].
• Just because she loves Jesus doesn’t mean she will love you the way you are.
• Just because he loves Jesus doesn’t mean he’ll be attracted to obesity.
• Just because she loves Jesus doesn’t mean she’ll overlook your insulting her in public [and she shouldn’t].
• Just because he loves Jesus doesn’t mean he will want to pray with you every time you close your eyes and bow your head.
• Just because she loves Jesus doesn’t mean she won’t be, um, a [bleep] once in a while.
• Just because he loves Jesus doesn’t mean he’ll initiate the DTR.
• Just because she loves Jesus doesn’t mean she’ll understand your desire to hang with the guys once in a while.
• Just because he loves Jesus doesn’t mean he won’t decide to break up with you [for no real reason at all].
• Just because she loves Jesus doesn’t mean she’ll take you back after your spontaneous breakup.
• Just because both of you love Jesus doesn’t mean you won’t need a whole bunch of therapy to make your relationship work.

Now it’s your turn. Try coming up with your own list. You might actually find it mildly entertaining.

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Matthew Paul Turner

Author Matthew Paul Turner

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