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HAPPY NEWS!

By June 19, 2007Blog


From various news sources online:

-7 out of every 10 Americans think the economy is ‘getting worse’ [That one is SO last year!]

-Michael Bloomberg says, ‘America is in Trouble’ [Hillary said that last week, the Pope has implied that, and my friend Larry who works at Kroger has been preaching that to me since 1998.]

-The world will end in 2060, according to Newton! [Evangelicals are hopeful.]

-According to ABC, Democratic candidates are ‘moving left’ [For most of the candidates, this might be true. But John Edwards says, “Oh, gosh no! I’ve just been listening to Beyonce on my iPod.”]

-Elisabeth on Rosie: We Aren’t Friendly [This is shocking!!!! OK, not so much. Everybody knows that Rosie and Elisabeth are about as compatible as Lindsay Lohan and sobriety. Maybe less so.]

That’s concludes this edition of “Happy News”!

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Matthew Paul Turner

Author Matthew Paul Turner

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