Grace is often difficult to receive.

When it comes to those who are closest to me, I am sometimes an idiot, codependent, a bastard even. In those moments when the situation finally comes to a head, and grace and forgiveness are being thrown onto me–why do I sometimes want to run? I think sometimes I am too pride-filled to receive a friend’s grace. Maybe I am fearful that it’s not real or that’s it comes with a “list,” and so I am tempted to reject it instead of embracing it and letting it sink in.

This weekend I had one of those experiences where I struggled to accept a friend’s grace. I kept feeling like I needed to earn it, like I needed to continue apologizing. Why is grace so uncomfortable at times? I don’t want it to be. I want it to be something I gratefully accept and lavish onto others. That’s what I desire, with at least as much of my heart that I can muster together…

(God, help me become humble enough to receive the grace that you extend through people.)

May his peace hold you, and wake you up to a new day.

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