Pastors say the craziest things. Especially the super “manly ones” like Pastor Elrod. He’s a pretty well known preacher in Florida with a blog. Here’s part of a recent post…
“Recently I had someone tell me I was the Simon Crowell (MPT comment: He means Cowell) of praise music…always being pretty hard on the fact that the majority of it is pretty wimpy and lame (MPT comment: I’ll agree with the lame part). It’s true…most of today’s praise music is a HUGE turn off for me….mainly because the guys writing it and singing it sound like…and dress like…they bought their underwear from Victoria’s Secret. (MPT comment: WTF? I have been to Victoria Secret and I’ve never seen a male praise and worship leader look anything like a Victoria Secret model. Just saying.) That’s why I call much of it “panty praise”. I’m a male…singing to God…who is a male (MPT comment: So does God have a penis? It’s just a question.) …and I feel like a big girl when I have to sing words like, Beautiful One, I love, Beautiful One, I adore, Beautiful One, my heart must sing…” (MPT comment: So King David was a girl? And Jesus a boy? This is getting confusing.)
“However, last week I discovered a cure for panty praise…”A Match Light In The Dark” by Lee McDerment. It’s dude rock for…well dudes. (MPT comment: Well, dude, let’s rock dude-style together with Lee singing in the background! Just an idea.)”
And then later our Panty Praise Pastor went on to say…
“My advice…peel off those silky drawers…run commando through your office (MPT comment: I vote no.)…and make a web-enhanced beeline for CD Baby to order this album. I promise this is not your wife’s praise music…file it under “wup your butt worship”…my laptop caught fire three times upon the first listen. Lee and his album definitely get the “Elrod Stamp Of Approval” that comes with my exclusive “no panty guarantee”!!!”
(MPT comment: Overcompensation? A little Elrod perhaps?)
**Amendment**
A reader sent me the following picture of Lee “the say-no-to-panties” worship leader. I’m sure it’s just an unfortunate picture, but I did fact check it, and it is him. I like him better already!
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hilarious
Beautiful One is an awesome song. I’m gonna have to disagree with Elrod.
This is frightening and I am glad I don’t go to this church.
I understand what he’s saying about today’s praise music but I’m not sure if replacing it with “pure pantyless praise” is a manly solution. I’d like to see the community response if his church organized a “pure pantyless praise” and worship service.
I fear that I’m putting my job at risk by even commenting on this. This is hilarious. I needed a good laugh today and you just gave it to me.
(MPT comment: WTF? I have been to Victoria Secret and I’ve never seen a male praise and worship leader look anything like a Victoria Secret model. Just saying.)
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Just curious – what does WTF mean to you?
what the fuck
I wasn’t going to comment cause I didn’t have anything terribly innovative to say, and this is super old…but your response to Anonymous is priceless. Love it.
Also, the post itself…I was raised on SCC and Amy Grant, but this guy started way to deep and just kept digging. Digging and digging and digging. Sigh.